Discipline, Growth or Both

This morning I woke and began my average prayer time and study. I guess it is not normal yet. I am trying to get it figured out now that I am alone in the house. But anyway… After some time in prayer, I went to a devotional, “Utmost for His Highest” by Oswald Chambers. The devotional was for August 14. The title is “The Discipline of the Lord.”

The verse that opens the devotionals is Hebrews 12:5.

Hebrews 12:5

The verse Chambers uses to preface this devotional is the last half of Hebrews 12:5, “My son, do not regard the discipline of the Lord lightly nor be weary when reproved by him?” As I read this passage and the rest of the devotional and several other passages in Hebrews, Isaiah and John, all I could think of was Pat and her passing, and if this was God disciplining me.

I supposed that it was possible. Isaiah reminds us that God’s thoughts are above ours…

Isaiah 55:9 (ESV)

9 For as the havens are higher than the earth,

so are my ways higher than your ways

and my thoughts than your thoughts.

But as quickly as I thought that thought, the concern about discipline was gone. Instead, I do believe that the Lord would not let a teachable moment pass. These losses were heartbreaking, and I know that when I am weak, he is strong.

The Blind Man Healed

I thought about the man who was blind from birth that John wrote about in chapter nine of his Gospel.

John 9:1-3 (ESV) Jesus Heals a Man Born Blind

1 As he passed by, he saw a man blind from birth. 2 And his disciples asked him, “Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind?” 3 Jesus answered, “It was not that this man sinned, or his parents, but that the works of God might be displayed in him.

The disciples had all kinds of questions, and Jesus had one answer.

Just like the disciples, I have had a lot of questions, but no answers I wanted, like Pat, healed and home with me; that’s what I wanted. But that was not the answer I got and that has been difficult.

Nor Be Weary

This phrase “Nor be weary…” comes from Hebrews 12:5. Some translations use the word “discouraged” instead of “weary.” There is this paragraph from today’s devotional that forced me to look at my circumstances closely, and it prompted this Blog Post

“…nor be discouraged when you are rebuked by Him.” We begin to pout, become irritated with God, and then say, “Oh well, I can’t help it. I prayed, and things didn’t turn out right anyway. So I’m simply going to give up on everything.” Just think what would happen if we acted like this in any other area of our lives!

I looked at this paragraph and paused to reflect. The thing I realized is that I did not get angry or give up.  Things did not happen the way I wanted, but Pat and Mom are both home. They had been healed just on the heaven side of eternity, and that I had to cherish.

Reflections

My heart aches for both my mother and Pat, but especially Pat. I prayed and requested prayer for healing daily.  But that healing did not come on this side of eternal life; it came on the heavenly side of eternal life for both.  How could I be angry about that?

Closing Thoughts

My selfish nature wishes every day that Pat and Mom were still with us on this side of eternity.  It can be very quiet in the house.  I do miss Pat so much.  I do not know why things happened as they did, but I know that the Lord will use this moment to teach me and prepare me for the next one, just like every other moment in my life.   I do not know what the next one will be, but I know He will be there just as He is with me now in this time of sorrow.

Prayer

Father God, thank you for your fantastic Word. Father, thank you for the reminder of your love.  Help me not take your discipline lightly, Lord, nor grow weary of it when you reprove me, for I know that you only discipline those you love.  Father, thank you for continuing to see me… to see us all through the trials of this world. Without you, we would perish. In Jesus’ name I pray, Amen.